Future Bachelor

Si & Veronica are feeling the good vibrations for episode 258! It’s week 9 aka Sex Week but actually no sex week according to Zach’s very silly declaration. Even absentee host Jesse thought it was a bad idea and ended up being right… Ariel, aka the sexiest contestant, gets her date first to eat bugs and makeout at the market and takes Zach’s “no sex” rule like a g when it comes to the overnight portion. Meanwhile, Gabi is already spiraling, which leads to a “always second” spiral on her private island/pirate ship date. Gabi really leaves it all on the field when she says she is falling for Zach, just for him to drop the bomb of his rule… and for them to break it. Because Zach is so worried about doing everything “right” he makes the poor decision to tell Gabi that he has to tell their sex story to Kaity and then ambushes Kaity mid date about what happened when she is a grown adult and could’ve been okay with assuming the potential sex and not being confronted with it. Kaity sticks around because she knows she’s his number one and Ariel gets sent home and has the most poised and graceful exit. There are a couple US Bachelor Nation faves joining our northern neighbors in the Canadian BIP. Charity’s potential cast has been leaked and she has quite the range of men looking for her love. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 54m:22s)

Selena Gomez stays winning as she becomes the first woman to reach 400 million followers on Instagram! Take that Kylie; anything for Selenas! If you remember Good Burger  from 25 years ago, get excited because Kenan and Kel are bringing us Good Burger 2. Throwback to some of our OG Future Bachelor episodes, but we finally get closure on XXXtentacion’s killers. Vee gave a sad “Yikes!” to Amanda Bynes being put on psychiatric hold after being found wandering the streets of LA naked. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Tormenta" by Gorillaz feat. Bad Bunny

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are sipping the syrup for episode 257! We get a double stacked week with Hometowns and Women Tell All. We got to see Zach go to Vermont with Gabi, Austin with Kaity, Georgia with Charity, and NYC with Ariel. Three out of the four women have some protective brothers, with Ariel’s brother taking the cake by asking Zach why Ariel should choose him. Kaity seems like the front runner especially after how easy it was to get Zach to do her chores for her. She gets the greenlight from her mom to continue their relationship and joins Charity in the club of telling him that she is falling in love. That didn’t save Charity as she was eliminated… but she will be our next bachelorette. Zach has many non-answers for the ladies when in the hot seat for the Women Tell All, but we finally see the Bachelor franchise taking accountability for its race issues by bringing in Dr. Kira Banks from St. Louis University and talking about microaggressions. From the previews, it looks like Zach isn’t going to keep his “no sex” promise for fantasy suites… In other Bach news, Ivan Hall proposed to his girlfriend AND bought her a new Tesla. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 1h:03m:31s)

This past week was the Oscars and Everything Everywhere All At Once were the big winners with seven awards, including most of the actor/actress categories and best picture. Lindsay Lohan is next up for our early aughts party queens getting pregnant. Time to get over season 3 of Love is Blind, because we have the singles of Seattle and season 4 right around the corner. Vee went “Yikes!” to Rachel Bilson pretty much admitting that her longtime ex and father of her child, Hayden Christensen, could never make her… ahem… finish. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Mike (desert island duvet)" by Fred again.., The Streets, Dermot Kennedy

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are feeling 100% confident for episode 256! Week 7 was a big week for Zach and his ladies and included lots of Hungarian bath houses. Greer gets shipped from Estonia post-quarantine to just get dumped in a hotel room. Kaity secured the first hometown date rose and seemingly the front-runner spot after revealing more about her daddy issues on her second one-on-one. The group date is a mindfuck for all the girls as a mentalista reads their minds and reveals some unsavory thoughts. Brooklyn gets a second one-on-one that is mostly Zach realizing he isn’t all in on her and can’t meet her sweet grandpa. Kat spiraled more this week and it causes Zach to lose confidence in their connection and send her home. Hannah Brown is becoming the reality show winning darling after winning Special Forces. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 51m:32s)

The Hailey/Justin Bieber vs. Selena Gomez drama continues as many think JBiebs bday party favor referenced how he was happy to not be with Selena… but also that Hailey was a second choice. Avril Lavigne and Tyga made it official at Paris Fashion Week. Is that the new IG official if you’re a celeb? Two new reality shows are coming down the line. One will feature identical twins being split up to find love and the other has a star studded cast of reality villains competing for money. Vee (and every Bravo fan) went “Yikes!” to what is now known as the “Scandoval” with Tom Sandoval and Raquel/Rachel having a months long affair under Tom’s longtime gf, Ariana’s, nose. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• “Red Ruby Da Sleeze” by Nicki Minaj

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are lacing up their shoes for episode 255! The Bachelor and his ladies are in Estonia this week looking for love. Charity gets a one-on-one redux complete with horse and carriage, weird wife carrying competitions, and dumping some of her relationship trauma. But before all of that, Kat set the tone by stealing a smooch moments before Zach took Charity on her date. Brooklyn makes it clear that what Kat did was classless but Kat can’t see past her perfect button nose. They try to all get rid of the bad vibes on their witchy group date, but Jess’s paranoia about a one-on-one gets the best of her and half sends herself home/half gets sent home. We here at Future Bachelor are #TeamAriel and she proves it even more with her honest and fun approach to her one-on-one at the Estonian sauna. Will the Kat and Brooklyn drama explode next week? Kaitlyn Bristowe thinks that Zach’s covid b-roll was filmed at a different time back in LA. MadiPrew and Grant Trizzy Troutt explained that purity contracts helped them be held accountable before their marriage. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 41m:24s)

Keke Palmer is now a boy mom! The SAG awards were this past week and there were big wins for Abbott Elementary, White Lotus, and more. Jenna Ortega and Aubrey Plaza twinned with their deadpan stares whilst presenting. Rebel Wilson is engaged to Ramona Agruma and they are definitely going to go full Disney adult for their wedding. Vee went “Yikes!” to the grown adult women participating in mean girl drama. Hailey Bieber and Selena Gomez seemingly haven’t squashed their beef and now Kylie is teaming up with Hailey. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

• ***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

  • "Wings" by Jonas Brothers

  --

  Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are feeling the (sinus) pressure for episode 254! We aren’t the only ones as Zach only was able to get one date under his belt before he was struck by Ms. Rona in London. Gabi got the coveted one-on-one AND shopping spree date, complete with royal perfumes and corgis. The group date girlies kept crying saying they had been stood up after being told multiple times that Zach wasn’t coming. But why let them get dressed for the cocktail party?!?! Charity also gets her one-on-one canceled but ends up getting a special gift during their virtual cocktail party. For all of us with Zoom fatigue, this episode felt like a bad nightmare. Greer was all of us saying how she is used to seeing her little square of herself in the corner, but she set Zach off with her end of quarter comments. But Kylee and Mercedes were the real losers this week with being dumped via video call. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 43m:39s)

Bruce Willis has been diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia and his family is trying to make his life as fun and active as they can for him. RIP to Richard Belzer of SVU fame. His pal Ice T mourned him just days after getting his Hollywood Walk of Fame Star. New couples alert! Kendall Jenner may have snagged Bad Bunny and the internet is up in arms. And Avril Lavigne was seen with Tyga in the midst of her engagement to Mod Sun ending. Vee went “Yikes!” to Tiger Woods’ distasteful tampon prank. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "It's Goin' Down" by X-Ecutioners, Mike Shinoda, Mr. Hahn

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are feeling the love for this Valentine’s week episode 253! These hottie mamas and Zach the snack are headed to the Bahamas for hopefully no drama… Spoiler: There was some. The pressure is on for girls to get more time with Zach, which leads to Anastasia trying to pull Zach away from the group date. Kylee tried to interrupt as politely as she could and thus the “fight” saga began. Should Anastasia be made the villain for knowing how many followers she’s bound to gain being on the show when that is her livelihood? Our 1:1 dates get into Kat’s mommy issues and Brooklyn’s daddy issues and abusive relationship past. Zach continued his trend of nipping the drama in the bud and sent Anastasia home before roses were even handed out. Kylee seems to have survivor's guilt, but most of the girls backed her actions. What is the bomb that they are going to drop on them next week in London? Clayton wrote a book about his mental health journey and his ex Rachel might be on her breast reduction journey. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 53m:21s)

Lebron James is the King for real now as he secured his spot as the top scorer in the NBA this past week. Our Queen Rihanna performed a whole halftime show while several months pregnant with her second child. One of the commercials during the big game announced the newest collab with McDonalds and it is rap couple Offset and Cardi B. Megan Fox and MGK are looking like they are no longer together after a cryptic IG post including some Lemonade lyrics. Vee went “Yikes!” to Bachelor Nation’s own Nick Viall claiming there hasn’t been a good Bachelor since him. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Saturday/Sunday" Jason Derulo, David Guetta

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica aren’t feeling toxic for episode 252! Jesse tried to make his date card announcements more dramatic than it was but we had a week full of dates and departures. Kaity got the full “night at the museum” treatment… but we wonder if those little cots saw more than sleep. As we prep for the Super Bowl, we got to see the girls leave it all on the field with an extra vicious Bachelor Bowl V. The names were probably the best part. Christina solidified herself as an early villain with some snide comments about Bailey’s departure and stealing Charity’s moment when Charity got the group date rose. Brianna used the pool party to spill some tea and name drop a certain content creator for Zach to have to confront as she bounced. Christina’s tears were not enough to earn her a rose and we saw the quickest rise and fall of a villain. Zach is cutting to the chase! Clare also cut to the chase and wed Ryan Dawkins this past week. Hannah G. and Dylan Barbour finally set a wedding date. Victoria Fuller is joining the Bachelor has-beens podcast club. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 46m:14s)

Beyonce and the Beyhive are hoping Ticketmaster doesn’t set a bad tone for her world tour. Beyonce also broke records with her new grammys, totaling her to over 30! Harry Styles beat her out for album of the year, but his pal Lizzo got record of the year. Kim Petras got to be the first openly trans artist to accept a Grammy. Vee went “Yikes!” to Leonardo DiCaprio supposedly dating a woman nearly 30 years his junior… the same age as the actress playing Pedro Pascal’s “daughter in Last of Us. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Worth It." RAYE

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are feeling like hot diggity dogs for episode 251! We get our first week of dates for Zach and his ladies. They blew the production budget with the first group date with having Latto and then three Bachelor Nation “bad bitch” alums, Victoria F., Tahzjuan, and Courtney (neither of us knew who she was). Tahzjuan didn’t think any of the women were up to snuff and attempted to join the season… but got denied by Zach. Christina Mandrell (got the name right this week) got the coveted first one-on-one date AND helicopter date AND chance to meet Zach’s family. She dropped the “I have a kid bomb” and Zach seems good with it… for now. The last group date of the week could’ve been mud wrestling for all we know because they only showed us the cocktail portion that included mostly makeouts. Brianna showed some cracks in her confidence over the course of the episode and even confronted villain-in-the-making, Christina. Hannah Ann got engaged to her NFL practice squad boo. And MadiPrew and Grant Trizzy Troutt are on their purity culture BS still with some podcast clips going viral. 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 38m:09s)

The Jonas Brothers announced their new (very uncreative in title) album at their Walk of Fame ceremony. Along with that coming in May, we will also have Fast X hitting theaters. Celebs are in the business of making babies with Paris Hilton welcoming her first via surrogate and Meghan Trainor announcing her second on the Today Show. Will the Spice Girls have a full reunion for the coronation of King Charles? Vee went “Yikes!” to disputes with Priscilla Presley and the validity of her late daughter, Lisa Marie’s, will. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed! 

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Two Tens" Cordae, Anderson .Paak

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Si & Veronica are looking for roses once again for episode 250! Zach Shallcross is ready to find love and some of these girls are already all in! This limo episode lacked crazy entrances with there being more one-liners and small props. America’s First Impression Rose winner, Briana, is still a fan favorite with her confidence and poise. Madison’s desperation got her kicked off before the rose ceremony. Zach might be making moves for Arie’s title of the makeout bandit (as we haven’t seen many moves for him to overtake Sean Lowe’s most shirtless title just yet). Greer won the first impression rose and she has already had to do a notes app apology about defending black face, so we are off to a great start! A real villain hasn’t emerged yet, but Christina Mandrell (sorry for calling her Catherine for the whole show whoops), might be a cocky contender. In other Bachelor Nation news, BIP faves Raven and Adam are expecting their second child who is due in July! 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 41m:26s)

Netflix is taking a page out of Are You The One? and Bachelor in Paradise’s books for a new show premiering on Valentine’s Day called Perfect Match. Selena Gomez says she’s still single after being seen on a couple of dates with The Chainsmokers’ Drew Taggart. Kylie Jenner finally revealed the name of her son and it is Aire Webster. We have a pop punk great ending with Panic! At the Disco and another being revived with Fall Out Boy’s first single since 2018 and a new album on the way. Vee went “Yikes!” to all the controversy surrounding Beyonce performing her “queer-inspired” album in Dubai, where same-sex relationships are illegal. Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "COMO UN BEBÉ" by J Balvin, Bad Bunny, Mr. Eazi

--

Follow us on Instagram!

Episode 249 | “Best Pal”

Si & Veronica are ringing in Vee’s last year of her 20s with episode 249! Nick Viall put a ring on his child bride this past week. Was his ring a potential podcast partner or just a good ethically sourced diamond company? Nick and Chris Harrison seem to be beefing… but it is more like a miscommunication manufactured as “drama” by Nick’s smart podcast producer. Natasha Parker is leaving Click Bait after feeling discouraged by the current path of the franchise. Another strong black woman out on the franchise… seems like the common denominator of the Bachelor machine might have to answer some questions soon. Dean and Caelynn celebrated their engagement in California recently and seem to be rocking and rolling on wedding planning. They won’t be having a wedding party to stand up with them at the altar. Is that going to be more peoples’ response to some of these comically large wedding parties we are seeing? 

(Bachelor talk ends at time marker 20m:10s)

RIP to some greats in the music scene, Lisa Mari Presley and Jeff Beck. Miley Cyrus’s lead single from her upcoming album is out and full of easter eggs. It is even our slapper this week with how it flips Future Bachelor fave, Bruno Mars, song on its head. Was it really filmed in the house her ex-husband Liam Hemsworth supposedly used to cheat on her? Only time will tell. Childish Gambino may make his return to the music scene after Donald Glover commented that we haven’t seen the last of his musical alter ego. Now will Rihanna drop new music before or after that happens? Vee went “Yikes!” to Ye supposedly being remarried to a Yeezy architectural designer, Bianca Censori. Is it even a legal marriage? Join us for what is always a good time and leave us a rating and review for a shoutout! Follow us @thefuturebachelor on Instagram! Thanks to you all who have subscribed!

--

For fun, great music updated weekly, follow FUTURE BACHELOR on Spotify!

***SLAPPER OF THE WEEK***

• "Flowers" by Miley Cyrus

--

Follow us on Instagram!